With These Hands
by CharlieBrownLover21
Summary: The blood was everywhere, and he couldn't remember anything. As he fled, crimson liquid staining his hands as he did so, only one word came to his clouded mind. Karen.
1. Prologue: The Sight

A/N: Okay so as many of my friends know, I LOVE James from Twilight! (Don't judge me!) And I finally decided that I wanted to write a story about him so, yeah I hope you enjoy! If I owned Twilight, do you think James would be dead? Puh-lease.

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Prologue: The Sight

James stood in the center of a massacre.

A bloodbath.

The blood drained corpses were everywhere.

What had he done?

He stared down at his blood stained hands. Then to the faces of the lifeless people around him.

He knew he was responsible for this carnage, but he didn t know why.

All he could remember was the burning. How all he wanted was to sooth the smoldering flames that licked his throat.

All he could remembered seeing was red, and then tasting the wonderful flavor of the unknown liquid that cured his blazing throat.

All he could remember was wanting more.

He fell to his knees, and let out a sob. He touched his cheek to discover that no tears emerged from his eyes. His chest felt hollow, like he was nothing but an empty shell. And he had this urge to lap up all of the blood that covered his hands.

What kind of monster had he become?

The sound of a siren made him turn. How was he able to hear something so far away?

He was not normal anymore.

The loud distress signal was growing closer, and he knew that he couldn't stay here.

He knew that if he was caught, he would be put to death.

Standing, he took one last look at the departed.

Forgive me.

And at an inhuman speed, James ran away from the scene. He vowed never to come back to this location. He would leave the city, even the country if he had to. He wanted to get away from this place. He wanted to get far away from the memory, the sight of the dead around him.

That sight, which marked the end of his human life as he knew it.

A/N: Yeah, so that was the beginning. Sorry, I know it was short. I'm going to start on chapter one as soon as I can. Please read and review, it makes me want to update quicker! Oh yeah and depending on what I write later on, the rating of the story might change. Just warning you! Thanks! ^_^ 


	2. Chapter 1: Just One Damn Letter

A/N: Okay here is the first chapter! I do not own Twilight cause if I did (read my A/N on the Prologue and insert here).

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Chapter One: Just One Damn Letter

Karen stood out on her porch waiting.

She knew it would come today.

It had to come today.

Her spirits soared when she saw the person she had been waiting for. The mailman with his bag of letters and parcels, walking up the sidewalk to her house.

She ran up to him as he began sifting through his bag of envelopes.

"Is there anything for me?" She asked, unable to control her excitement.

The man handed her two thick envelopes.

"Sorry hon, just your mother's bills."

And as quick as they had risen, her spirits crashed back down.

The mailman must have noticed the impending doom that was obviously stricken across her face, because he patted her on the back and gave her a weak grin.

"Don't worry. Maybe tomorrow."

Yeah. Or maybe never.

She stormed into the house, her happy mood totally spent.

Your mail, mom. She said flinging the worthless pieces of paper onto the table.

Her mom poked her head out of her room, a huge smile displayed across her face.

Did you get a letter from James?

She scowled, and stomped up the stairs to her room.

I guess that s a no She heard her mom mutter.

Once locked inside her room, Karen threw herself upon her bed and buried her face in her pillows.

Had he completely forgotten about her?

She met him when she was five. She remembered always complaining about how she wanted his pretty blue eyes instead of her grey ones. And then he had made her laugh when he told her that he d rather have her eye color. They became best friends almost instantly.

Funny how children will do that.

It didn't matter that he was one year older than her; they did everything together. They fought together, played together, cried together when one of them had to leave the other's house.

And when she turned fifteen, he was her first love.

She remembered the day they shared their first kiss.

It was awkward, and unexpected, and yet, it was one of the greatest things that had ever happened to her.

She remembered the day he moved.

She had begged him not to go, but he had said that he was doing what was best for his future. He spouted some bullshit about how he needed to think about college, since he was going to be a senior the following year.

Despite her pleas, he moved away. But he had made her a promise.

I swear that I will write to you every week. Every week. I promise that we ll keep in contact.

And he kept his promise, for a little while anyway. He sent her a letter every week explaining to her how his new high school was, how the people and teachers were like.

And how much he thought of her.

A year without him had passed and the letters kept coming. Sometimes he would even call. She loved those days. The sound of his voice made her so happy that she would be wearing a smile for days.

But then, on the week of her graduation, the letters suddenly stopped.

She had sent him an invitation, and was heart-broken when he didn t show. He didn t call to wish her congratulations, or tell her why he wasn t able to be there. And she had no idea why.

So now, it has been three months since she left high school.

And there were no letters, no calls.

She had tried to tell herself that he was just busy with work or school, but after the second month, it was pointless.

He obviously didn t care about her anymore.

She squeezed her pillow, wishing he was hurting as much as she was. Tears threatened to emerge from her dark grey eyes.

You'd think after all they had been through, he would be able to send her a fucking letter once and a while.

She figured he met some chick and went off to make a life with her, or some crap like that. Maybe he found a girl that he loved more than her.

She cringed at the thought.

She pulled her pillows closer to her and let the tears that she had been holding back flow from her eyes.

All she wanted was just one damn letter.

A/N: Hoped you liked it! Please read and review! Next up, JAMES'S POV!! YEAH!! OMG!! HURRAY! Ahem, sorry I kinda lost control of myself for a moment there...


	3. Chapter 2: The Man In The Mirror

A/N: I love James, but sadly (Very freaking sadly) I don't own him. I don't own any of the Twilight Characters. Please enjoy chapter dos!

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Chapter Two: The Man In The Mirror

James hadn't known how beautiful the world was.

Everything was so sharp, so clear.

He could see everything in such a high quality, not a speck of dust went unnoticed to his keen eyes.

And he could hear.

He heard cars coming down streets that were miles away from him. He could hear the sounds the animals made in the distance.

It was like he had been blind and deaf until now.

But the biggest change of all was that he could smell.

He could identify what things were by their smell now.

He smelt deer, rabbits, mice.

Humans.

The human smell was the strongest, the most attractive.

It made him want to run towards it, take it.

Kill it.

He ran faster trying to get as far away from the delicious smell as possible.

He wasn't a monster. He didn't want to kill anybody else.

But deep inside he knew he was a monster.

He wasn't the same anymore.

_But what am I then?_

He began wracking his brain, trying to find out what had happened.

But all he could remember was the burning.

And then the slaughter.

Everything else was a blur of unknown memories.

He knew he used to be a human, but he couldn't figure out why he changed or what happened to make him change.

And what was he?

He thought about the insane speed, the brand new senses.

The thirst for human blood.

And only one word came to him.

Vampire.

He laughed at his stupidity. Vampires weren't real. They were fake. They were horror movies. They were fictional.

But what else then?

He had never heard of a psychopath going crazy enough to drain someone's blood with his own mouth.

And liking how the blood tasted.

And wanting more.

So what now then?

If he was a vampire, was garlic poison to him? Would he burn if he touched a cross? Could a stake through the heart kill him?

How come he couldn't remember anything?

He stopped running when he reached a worn down cabin.

He took a deep breath, and was relieved to find that there were no humans inside.

He walked up to the door and pushed it open.

And it flew off of its hinges.

He stood there, taken aback by what had just occurred.

He looked down to his hands. He hadn't pushed hard.

But apparently, the broken door showed otherwise.

So, power comes with being a vampire?

That didn't seem too bad.

He walked around the abandoned cabin. It was very small; only two rooms. A bathroom and a front room.

With a gaping hole for a door.

He made a mental note to fix that later.

He peeked into the bathroom, and froze.

A mirror hung over the tiny sink, and an unknown face stared back at him, a shocked look was on his face.

James immediately knew that the reflection of the man in the mirror was not his own.

The man in the glass had perfect hair, clear, smooth skin, and strangest of all, blood red eyes.

He knew that his eyes were not supposed to be that color.

He smiled as he recalled a memory of his human life.

Blue.

His eyes used to be blue.

He had a flash of a small girl.

_"Your eyes are so pretty. Darn. I wish my eyes were blue."_

Who was she?

His friend perhaps?

He couldn't remember.

He waved his hand and the man across from him copied his movement.

So this was his new look.

He turned on the faucet and took a whiff of the flowing water.

It smelt good, clean, fresh.

He brought a huge handful up to his mouth and took a drink, only to spit it back out.

It tasted weird.

That blood tasted good though, his brain rudely reminded him.

He took one last glance in the mirror and decided that he hated his eyes.

They reminded him of the people's blood he spilt.

He shivered slightly, and stepped back into what he guessed was the living area.

And surprisingly, he didn't know what to do.

He thought about sleeping, but he didn't feel tired.

And so he sat down on the floor and tried to recall his past.

What else could he do?

No way in hell was he was going outside. There were too many good smells out there that could tempt him.

_"Your eyes are so pretty. Darn. I wish my eyes were blue."_

He kept replaying the voice in his mind of the young girl.

What was her name?

Could she give him answers to his past?

He laid down, frustrated. He knew he wasn't going to fall asleep. There was no urge to.

But why?

He hated how he had so many questions and no answers for them.

Closing his eyes, he began to think.

And nothing else.

He laid still for many hours, wondering if he would grow uncomfortable and have to change position.

But he didn't get uncomfortable.

But after a while, he did notice the bulge in his shirt pocket.

He reached his hand into it and pulled out a folded sheet of thick paper.

He traced over the big letters on the front.

"You're invited!" It said, in dark blue letters.

Being careful not to rip the thin, delicate paper, he opened it and began to read.

_Dear James,_

_Of course you're invited to my graduation! You're my best friend dummy, so don't pretend like you're surprised. It's been so long. I doubt I've changed much even though a year has passed. But you? I'm sure the girls at your college are all fighting over you! Well, the day has finally come when I will be released from the Hell called high school, and you better be there to witness it. Let s just hope I don't trip and fall on my face when I go up to get my diploma. Wouldn't that be a sight to see? So anyway, hope you're there. I miss you more than anything._

_Love You Always,_

_Karen_

He reread the letter over and over again.

So the girl in his memory was Karen. And they were best friends.

Gently, he refolded the letter, and placed in back in his pocket.

He would treasure it always.

"Karen." He whispered.

Something flowed through him that he recognized as happiness.

Karen.

He smiled.

It was such a beautiful name.

A/N: So what did you think of Chapter two? I enjoy writing the James POV'S because in Twilight it never tells you what his past was like. So it kinda leaves open a big empty space to imagine what his past could've been. (Which makes for really great stories! ^_^) I guess that's why I'm staying up till 12:00 AM to write this... Also it's your reviews. I love hearing what you think of my stories, so R&R people! Oh yeah, and I think I said in the last chapter that I might have to make this rating go up, because of the violence (and maybe other things...) later on in the story. So, sorry to my buddy Courtney who doesn't like M rated fanfics. (But supports ALL of my stories! Even the ones she doesn't understand) You know who you are! ^_^


	4. Chapter 3: Suspected

**A/N: Okay so here is chapter three! Enjoy!**

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Chapter Three: Suspected

Karen? Dinner is ready, sweetheart.

Karen groaned at her mother s call.

She didn t want to eat. All she wanted to do was sulk and cry, and for everyone to just leave her the hell alone.

Karen!

But alas, her mother would not be denied.

Coming. She mumbled.

She slowly got up from her bed and rubbed her eyes.

Why did mothers have to care so much?

A shriek and the sound of glass breaking made her jump.

Mom? She called.

When there was no answer, she bolted from her room and down the stairs.

Mom?! Are you okay?!

When she reached the bottom, she saw her mother standing in the living room, gawking at something that was on television.

She marched up to her. Jesus mom, you scared the shit out of me, what s wrong?

Her mom was silent, her eyes glued on the news reporter speaking.

Karen was about to start complaining about being ignored when she caught a little bit of what the man on the TV said.

Nineteen year old James Thomas has been reported missing today.

Her breath hitched in her throat.

Turn it up, mom.

Her mom s hand slowly reached up to the TV and turned the volume up.

The man continued with his story.

His parents had informed police that he was going away for a month or so to visit a friend in another state. He hadn t called for awhile, and had been gone longer than planned, but they figured he just wanted his space and thought nothing of it. That was until today when they stopped by his house for a visit, and found his place trashed. Traces of his blood were found throughout the house, along with five other murder victims. What may be even more terrifying is that there was no blood what so ever from the other five casualties. It was as if the killer had drained them. The police only have two suspects so far. The parents of the Thomas, or James Thomas himself. The police have theories that

Slowly the man s voice became a low, murmur and Karen began to drown out his voice with her thoughts.

James was going to visit her. He was going to come to her graduation.

But something stopped him.

Could it be true, that her best friend was a killer?

Why would he want to murder those innocent people?

She shook her head. Ashamed of herself for thinking like that.

James was not a killer.

Her mom swallowed, and turned to face her.

Maybe, it was a good thing he isn t sending you letters anymore, hon.

She lurched back, the force of her mother s words feeling like a slap to the face.

How could you say such a thing?!

Her mom looked horrified.

Karen, baby, just think about it. His blood was on the scene. He killed those people!

She shook her head and backed away.

No. I can t believe- Mom, he s my best friend! You know James mom. You know he would never do that!

Her mom sat down at the table and sighed.

I don t know what to think anymore, Karen.

Karen shook her head again.

No.

Just quit assuming things! She yelled running back upstairs to her room.

It can t be.

She ignored her mother s calls, and locked the door behind her.

There was just no way.

The boy she had grown up with all her life, the boy she had fallen in love with, was being accused of murder.

The boy with the ocean blue eyes, the boy she would die for, was missing and his blood was at the scene of a crime.

To hell with what the police say or find.

Her James was not a murderer.

**A/N: So did you like? Sorry but this chapter was a bit short, and I came up with a last name for James on the spot, so if you hate the name Thomas, my bad. But please review and tell me what you think! Thanks! ^_^ Oh and props to KSAT 12 news! (I love that news channel! Sorry, totally random) LOL!**


	5. Chapter 4: The Kill

**A/N: Sorry guys, but I've made my decision. If you hadn't already saw (seen?), this fanfiction is officially rated M for the violence in this chapter and the next. (Sorry Aly. Read at your own risk. U know who u are. ^_^) But to all of my readers, please continue to read and review. (As long as ur okay w/the rating) Thank you very much! ^_^**

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Chapter Four: The Kill

The throbbing in James's throat grew over night.

And by the time the sun rose to its highest point, his throat was burning.

And all he could think about was blood.

He _wanted_ it.

He stood where the door to the cabin used to be, smelling everything that passed by.

When his nose caught a whiff of humans, he slowly took a step out of the house.

Something about these humans was odd.

By the different scents, he could tell that there were three of them. Their blood smelled wonderful, but one scent stood out among the other two.

It was a young boy.

And his blood smelled the best.

It was like the blood was calling to him. _Demanding_ that he drink it. It was as if none of the other humans mattered, as long as he got the boy.

He had to _taste_ him.

And although he didn't want to kill, the thought of being able to have power over the people he used to be part of, excited him.

He was no longer an equal.

He was much stronger.

And he knew he could overpower them.

He knew he could _kill_ them.

And then, he understood.

This is what he was.

And no one could take him back to the life he used to have.

This is how he would always be.

So without another thought, James took off into the direction of the smell.

He found them easily enough.

_Too_ easy.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you not to walk the forest alone?" He said coming out from behind a tree to stand in front of them.

The two girls, which looked like they could've been the boys older teen sisters gasped and took a step back.

He inhaled.

Fear.

He made up his mind that he liked that smell; it made their hearts pump the blood faster.

He ignored the shocked looks on the girl s faces and glanced at the boy.

"There can be freaks out here, you know." He continued, circling them as he talked.

He loved the way their eyes followed him, but their bodies stayed frozen.

"W-why are you shining like that?" One of the girls asked taking him off guard.

Shining?

He looked down to his hands to see that they were sparkling.

It was as if he was made of millions of diamonds.

This, he realized, is why he had never seen a vampire. Why they were considered to be fantasies.

Because they couldn't come out during the day.

It was not like the sunlight caused him any pain, because it didn't. But the sunlight told everyone that he was different.

That he wasn't one of them.

"What are y-you?" The girl asked taking another step back.

He leaned forward, his body instinctively going into a crouch.

"Run." He whispered.

It took a moment for the girls to comprehend his words, but after a second, they sunk in. The two teenagers grabbed the small boy s hands and took off.

He waited for a moment, savoring the lingering scent of the boy. There was no rush. He knew he could out run them.

And when he could take it no longer, he ran, trees whipping past him as he did so.

He was gaining on them by the second.

The smell of fear grew, and so did the burning in his throat.

He knew the kill was growing closer.

He leapt over the running children, blocking their paths. They stopped abruptly, all of them gasping for air.

"Too slow." He said shrugging.

He took a step closer, and one of the sisters reached into her pocket and pulled out a knife.

"Stay the fuck away from us!" She screamed pointing it at him.

He didn't stop his advances. Somehow he knew that the knife posed no threat to him.

With one quick movement, he was behind them in seconds, the boy standing in front of him.

His _prey_.

Before the girls could turn around he had the boy in his grasp, tilting him at an angle as to view his neck better.

He closed his eyes and listened, ignoring the screams and the pitiful attacks of the boy's sisters. He could hear the throbbing of the boy s heart as it brought the blood to his body.

And to his throat.

He opened his eyes, blinded by his hunger to feed, and focused on the part of the child's throat that sang to him the loudest.

The jugular.

And then he sunk his teeth in.

As he felt the thick liquid enter his mouth, he heard the astonished shriek of the sisters, and the gasp of the boy.

But soon he didn't care anymore. The taste of the boy's mouthwatering blood was too much. He sucked at the gash drawing out every drop of the crimson liquid the small body held.

The burning in his throat was soothed with every swallow, and before he knew it, the boy was lifeless in his arms.

His grip loosened, and he let the now dead body fall to the ground.

Turning, he saw the girls running away.

He looked back down to the small boy.

He couldn't have been older than eight.

James turned from the scene and ran.

Was this what he was destined to be?

A murderer? A fiend?

A monster?

It seemed that when his throat wasn't begging for blood, he could think straighter. He was more sane.

And he couldn't believe what he did.

Such a young life he took. He couldn't help but wonder, did that little boy have dreams? Did he want to be something when he grew up?

But he had no chance to do that now.

He cringed, trying to banish away the horrible thoughts.

After a moment, he realized what he wanted most.

He wanted answers.

He wanted to find out who gave him this curse.

He wanted to kill whoever it was.

A picture flashed into his mind. It was him, and the girl Karen.

Kissing.

_"I love you, James."_

Love.

Had he felt that for her at one time? Because now, love seemed like a forgotten, pointless emotion.

He didn't love _anything_.

Even so, the word made him feel warm inside.

Looking down, he saw a piece of the white invitation sticking out of his shirt pocket.

And then he knew what he was going to do.

A/N: Omg, am I sadistic for killing the poor little boy? Well, sorry, you should expect much worse from James. (Swoons) I love James! Don't ask why, I just do! ^_^ Please review, and sorry that this took so long to get out. Next chapter coming soon!


	6. Chapter 5: Never Walk Alone

**A/N: Okay so my friend has been bugging the crap outta me to put this next chapter up. It's short, and I do apologize for that, but I'm hoping this can hold her (you know who u are) over until the next update comes. So please enjoy!**

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Chapter 5: Never Walk Alone

As soon as darkness fell, Karen left her home.

She didn't know where she was going to go or how she was going to get there, all she knew was that she had to get out.

She had to get away from her mother's doubt, and she had to get away from the news. Everyone was against James.

But she refused to believe what anyone said.

James could not be a killer. Besides his parents, she was the one who knew him the best. She had known him for years.

Isn't that long enough to tell whether someone was a good person or not?

People_ change,_ her brain rudely remarked.

She shook her head trying to banish any thoughts of James or murders. She just wanted to take a walk. She needed to breathe.

She looked around at all of the houses and saw that no lights were on in any of them. The wind blew strong, causing her to clutch her sweater close to her body. It was like a scene from a horror movie, she thought. The stupid girl that walked alone at night, and the killer that stalked her was close behind.

And then he pounced.

Glancing behind her, she saw nothing. Just darkness, slightly illuminated by the street lamps that lined the street. She scowled, forcing a smile to her lips.

You're just scaring yourself. Calm down.

For a brief moment she thought about turning back to her house, but decided against it. She didn't want to be anywhere near this place.

There were too many memories.

As the silence surrounded her, she found herself wishing that she had someone to talk to. But nobody was out. Everyone was in their house, sleeping.

She was completely alone.

Suddenly this idea was looking really stupid.

She let out a defeated sigh and turned around to begin the semi-long walk home.

And then the silence was broken with the snap of a twig.

She spun on her heels, looking to where the sound had come from.

"Hello?" She asked meekly, hoping that it was just a neighbor poking around in their front yard.

But nobody was outside.

She kicked herself inwardly. What a stupid idea! She glanced from side to side her breath coming out much quicker than it should have. Her mother had always warned her about walking alone. She had told her never to go out at night unless you have someone with you, or at least a cell phone to call for help.

But had she listened?

No.

The chilling air blew against her already cold chest. She held her lanky sweater even closer to her body.

Something didn t feel right.

She kept taking quick glances behind her. She wasn't sure if she was just being paranoid, but she couldn't help but feel like there was an unseen pair of eyes fixated on her back.

She could sense that something was terribly wrong.

Maybe it was because the street she now walked down was vacant; not one person to be seen. Or perhaps, it was because she had the feeling that she was being followed.

She knew someone was close behind her, yet she could see no one.

She picked up speed knowing that her house was only a few more blocks. You re going to make it, she told herself, and you ll be just fine. She told herself this, though her gut feeling told her otherwise.

And then a hand touched her shoulder.

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James ran as quickly as he could towards the smell. It was far off, and weak, but something in his brain told him to follow it.

Something in his brain shouted, "It's Karen!"

He knew the smell was of a human; that much was positive. But he didn't know Karen's scent, so how could he be sure? The invitation had given him everything; her address, phone number, state, city. But as he closed in on the distination he couldn't help but wonder if she would really be there.

Only one thing he was absoulutely sure about.

He needed to see her.

He had so many things: power, beauty, keen instincts, you'd think he would be satisfied.

But he was not.

He longed for company.

He longed for answers.

He longed for... Karen.

Maybe then, would he be satisfied with what he had become.

Deep down, he knew that this Karen would be able to tell him about his past. But in his head one question kept haunting him.

Would Karen still love him despite what he had done?

If love was such a powerful emotion, and she had cared for him so long, could she be able to forgive his monsterous acts?

Or was love just a word?

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Karen knew she was in deep shit.

There were two of them.

Two men, standing before her. They were smiling.

"What is a pretty girl like you walking the streets at night?" The first one asked leaning down to look at her, his hand resting lightly on her shoulder.

"And all alone, too." The other one said taking a step closer.

She tried to steady her breathing as she took a step backwards. She had to get out of this somehow.

"I was just heading home."

The men glanced at each other and laughed. "Is that so?" The one closest to her questioned, raising an eyebrow.

She nodded taking another step back. "Run!" Her brain screamed.

"Cute." The man said smiling. She heard a light swish, and her eyes shot to the second man, who now held a small pocket knife in his left hand. He grinned at her.

Oh my god.

She didn't wait any longer; she turned and bolted, screaming at the top of her lungs. Her adrenaline was pumping, and she knew that her house was only a few more blocks.

Just a few more blocks.

She thought that maybe she had a chance until she felt a sharp pain shoot up her leg. She yelped and toppled to the ground only to see the two men hovering over her.

Looking down to the source of the pain, what she saw made her want to puke.

The small knife was buried into her thigh, blood already leaking from the wound. She reached down to try and craddle the injury, but the first man shoved her onto her back, pinning her hands high above her head.

"You can take her second, Ray." He said smirking. Ray, the second man, pulled out a cell phone and Karen watched in horror as a red light shone from it.

"You go ahead, I won't miss a bit of it."

Karen fought down the bile rising in her throat. They were going to rape her.

And tape it.

Before she knew it, her shirt was off and the man was brutally biting her neck.

She cried out, only to be slapped in the face.

"Shut up, bitch. And don't move. I want to enjoy this."

She could feel the heat coming from her cheek, and the tears that had begun to flow down her face. She struggled against him as he tried to remove her bra, and he bit down on her neck hard, drawing blood.

"I said, don't move!"

She could hear the other man's chuckle as he fumbled with the zipper on her pants.

"You tell that bitch."

Oh god she wanted to die.

She gave up struggling. That was getting her no where. He would just hit her again. But getting away seemed hopeless now. What could she do?

When she was completely naked to them, the man defiling her moved a little so that Ray could get a better view with the phone.

This was the worst humiliation. This was hell.

"So _pretty_." Ray murmured circling her from every angle. And then he brought the phone right up next to her face.

"What is your name, sweetheart?"

She couldn't stop the tears that flowed from her eyes. She turned her face away from the phone, her body shaking as she cried like she had never cried before.

"Karen. My name is Karen." She sobbed.

And then it all happened so fast.

**A/N: I was going to make this chapter longer, but I decided to cut it where it is. I'll admit, I wanted to leave you hanging. (Sorry. ^_^) So the next update should be coming really soon, please read and review. The reviews make me happy! ^_^**


	7. Chapter 6: The Fear

**A/N: I won't say much because I know you just want to read. Enjoy, and thank you for your patience.**

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Chapter 6: The Fear

As James grew closer, the smell of blood grew stronger.

Whoever he was tracking, was bleeding.

He moved quicker, suddenly finding himself in a vacant street.

He crouched behind a tree and looked around spotting two men and a girl.

His eyes widened as he stared at her. She was the girl from his memory.

Another flash hit him.

_"Why are you leaving me James?! How could you?!"_

She was sobbing.

_"Don't you know how much I love you?"_

This girl must be Karen, his brain screamed. But how could he know for sure?

He stayed at a distance and watched. One man was biting her, hurting her. The other was circling her with something in his hands.

James growled. He wanted to help her. But the blood was just so strong. It sang to him just like the small boy's did. He didn't know if he could control himself.

He cringed as they stripped her bare, the second man crouching down to stick whatever he had in her face.

"What is your name, sweetheart?" He heard him ask.

James tensed. This was it.

He watched the girl turn her head to the side, and sobbed.

"Karen. My name is Karen."

That's all the encouragement he needed.

---

It all happened so fast.

One moment the man was removing his pants, and Karen braced herself for the pain that she knew was coming, then the next moment, he was gone.

She sat up to see a different man holding the man that was attacking her by his throat.

The man was tall, slender. It was hard to see his face because of the night.

Who was this guy?

"How _dare_ you!" She heard him growl.

And then she heard a sickening snap; the man that had hurt her head's twisted at an odd angle.

She screamed and covered her eyes. Over her scream she heard another.

"Alex!"

She looked behind her to see Ray take a step back, the cell phone landing with a crack as it slipped out of his hands. His eyes were wide as the unknown male walked up to him.

Oh my god.

The man popped his knuckles, and smirked.

"W-wait, don't-"

She couldn't form the words, she was shaking too badly. A dead man lay a few feet away from her, blood seeping out of his broken neck.

Oh my _god._

Ray stayed frozen as the man approached.

"Do you like hurting women?" He asked.

Karen jumped as a hiss came from his lips. She immediately knew that this guy was not normal. What was he? Who was he?

She watched in horror as the man grabbed Ray's arm and twisted it until it snapped. He did the same with his other arm, and his legs, laughing as he did so.

"AAAAH!"

At the sounds of the screaming and snapping, Karen turned to the side and vomited. Never in her life had she witnessed a murder. Never had she ever seen someone get tortured.

Never had she thought it possible.

The screams suddenly stopped, and were replaced with a sucking sound. She turned back to the gruesome scene, and shrieked.

The man was drinking Ray's blood.

His _blood._

His lips were tightly clasped around Ray's neck, and the ruby liquid dipped out of his mouth as he sucked.

When she watched this only one thing came to her.

Vampire.

But how? Vampires weren't real.

Right?

But she had no other way to explain what was happening in front of her. And then the man suddenly stopped, and she could see him turn towards her.

Was it her turn to die next?

She crawled back, trying her best to cover herself.

"Please, p-please don't k-kill m-me."

Karen had never felt such fear in her life. She shook terribly, and she felt like death was just around the corner. This man, whoever he was, was a killer. So why wouldn't he want to kill her too?

He stood up, running his hand over his mouth.

"Karen." He whispered.

She gasped. How did he know her name?

She was going to ask him, but suddenly she felt faint. She looked to her leg and saw a large pool of blood underneath her.

She had lost so much of it.

"Don't hurt me."

That was the last thing she remembered saying before her world went to black.

**A/N: Wow that really took a long time to get up. Sorry. I was debating what to do with this chapter, and then I figured this was the best way to write it. Thank you to all of my wonderful reader's, your reviews keep me strong! ^_^ Please tell me what you thought, and the next chapter will hopefully be up soon! Thank you.**


	8. Chapter 7: A Terrifying Beauty

**A/N: Wow I do not know what inspired me to write but I did it. Here is Chapter Seven for you guys, and I apologize for the wait. I know this chapter is short, but I will try to update it as soon as possible. Thank you to my readers who support me.**

**---**

Chapter Seven: A Terrifying Beauty

The smell of her tears, her blood, and the sound of her name made him snap.

He had never felt such rage in his whole life.

The moment her name was spoken, the monster inside him awakened and charged.

The kills were slow and painful; he enjoyed the sound of their bones crunching underneath his finger tips.

And he relished their screams.

And now as he ran, the naked woman in his arms, he could still smell the fear and see the look in their eyes as he killed them.

And he liked it.

Truthfully, he didn't know what he was going to do with Karen. It had taken all of his will power to stop the bleeding in her leg and bandage the wound, and even now that it was covered he still didn't breathe. He didn't want to risk her safety.

He knew her family would report her missing, but he didn't care. He needed answers. He needed company.

And now he had it.

He wondered if she remembered him. She didn't look too different from the picture in his mind; so could his human life be that long ago?

After running for only what seemed like a few minutes to him, he reached his cabin. He figured he would keep her there so that when she awoke, he would be able to ask her what he needed to know.

Gazing down at her sleeping form he began to think of what sleep was like. He didn't know why, but ever since he became what he was he didn't sleep at all. It was very confusing at times, but at least he had a lot more time on his hands.

More time for Karen.

He set her on the floor of the cabin and draped his jacket over her.

He spent the rest of his night gazing at her beautiful face.

---

When Karen woke up, she was amazed at what a horrible dream she had had.

In the dream she had almost been raped, seen a bloodthirsty monster, and watched that same monster kill and drink the blood of her attackers.

But it was all a dream.

Well at least that's what she thought, until her blurry vision adjusted.

The first thing she noticed was that she was in an unfamiliar place. She was laying on the floor, which was very hard, of some house she had never seen before.

Second, was the pain in her leg. She glanced at it to see that it was tightly bandaged, but it still throbbed like it had its own heart beat.

And then the events from the night before crept back into her mind.

"You're awake."

The voice startled her, and she looked to the side to see the man that killed her attackers leaning against a far wall. Shadows enveloped his figure.

She shook and backed away to the wall farthest away from him.

"Please don't hurt me."

He stood up straight and made his way over to where her quivering body sat.

"Karen." His voice sounded like gold. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever heard and yet, she wanted to get as far away from it as possible.

And when he stepped out of the shadows and into the small amount of light that came through the open door way, she saw a familiar face.

Her breath was taken away from her and as he got closer she became more and more dumbfounded.

What she saw before her was the most beautiful man in the world. His dirty blond hair was pulled into a pony-tail behind his head; his features were smooth, perfect. The only thing that made her question herself was his eyes. They were as red as the blood that was spilt yesterday. Crimson.

He was terrifying but so beautiful.

"James?"

He was her best friend.

**A/N: R&R peoples! I hope you like the newest chapter. Sorry it took so long. ^_^**


	9. Chapter 8: Crimson Eyes

**A/N: Sorry this took so long. WARNING: Breif not really good enough to be called sexual content in this chapter. This is for Courtney. You know who you are. ^_^**

**Enjoy.**

**---**

**Chapter Eight: Crimson Eyes**

Karen's breath hitched in her throat.

"James?" She called out.

He took a few more steps his perfect face contorting with some kind of mixed emotion.

"Yes." The beautiful voice answered.

Her hands were shaking as she slowly got to her feet, not moving from her current spot.

"You...weren't at my...graduation." She mumbled; that was the first thing that had come to mind.

"I know." He replied.

Another step.

She tried to frame herself against the wall, scared shitless. She recalled the news report at her house before she was attacked. About the killings. About how the blood was sucked dry.

By this time, he was in front of her, mere inches away.

Her trembling hand reached out to his own, her eyes locked onto his strange, red ones. They were not the eyes she once knew.

"Did you..._kill_...those people?" She choked out praying that she would hear the answer that she wanted. Her best friend could not be a killer. It just was not possible.

Her hand brushed his and she gasped, retracting it quickly. It was so cold.

"I've killed a lot of people." He answered watching her reacction.

She shook her head violently. "No. That wasn't you..."

His hand grabbed hers, his face looked scared. "It was."

His icy cold fingers dug into her skin and she screamed. She tried to push away from him but he was just too strong.

"Let me _go_! You're _not_ James! You're not him!" She screamed as tears began to flow down her cheeks. What had her best friend become? Was this some kind of nightmare?

Suddenly she was pulled against his chest. He hugged her tightly causing her screams to be cut off.

"It's me, Karen!" He yelled as his body shook. It was as if he were crying but no tears came from his eyes as they were from hers.

"It's _me_!"

She let out a cry and held onto his cold form to prevent herself from collasping to the floor. She felt faint. This couldn't be right.

"I remember you, but I can't remember anything else!" He said, his golden voice rising with panic. "I can't remember _anything_, and I don't know what to _do_!" He screamed clutching her tighter.

It was silent for a moment as Karen's shaking began to slow.

"I'm _scared_." He whispered low in her ear.

She shivered. "Me too."

He shook slightly pulling her closer. "I saw those men and I couldn't let them-" His voice was cut off and he growled.

"And then the blood was just too much for me, Karen." He continued. "I think that I may have become a..."

She clung to him tighter. "A...vampire?"

He was silent for a moment. Karen couldn't even hear him breathing.

"Yes."

Her heart thumped unevenly. She didn't know what to do. She was scared; she couldn't deny that. She just couldn't get over the fact that James had killed those people. That wasn't her James.

But her James had changed.

Her tears had begun to slow and she reached her arms around his neck to hold him closer. His neck was like ice, but she didn't care. She rested her chin on his shoulder and with one hand softly stroked his hair.

"It's okay." She murmured. "I'm sure you'll be okay."

He took in a quick breath. "You won't leave me?"

She pulled back to look him in the foreign eyes missing the oceans she used to see.

"Of course not."

He touched her cheek and she alowed the cold to wash over her like a wake-up call.

"Thank you, Karen."

---

_"James I love you, I love you." The young woman spoke as the young man kissed her neck._

_The young man moaned her name as she kissed him softly on the mouth._

_Their bodies connected as if they were somehow made for each other, fitting together perfectly like pieces of a puzzle. Perfect. They were perfect for each other._

_The young couple, **oblivious** to the world around them, was not worried about anything._

_The young couple, **loved** each other too much to think that they would ever be apart._

_And the young couple, as they made love, did not notice the woman with eyes of **crimson** sitting outside their window._

**A/N: Okay so that left the story with some mystery. I will start to write little parts like that to start revealing James's past. Sorry this chapter took so long.**


	10. Chapter 9: To Steal From a Blind Man

**A/N: Wow, it has been FOREVER since I updated this story, I am terribly sorry about that my dear readers.**

**I do apologize for your waiting and disappointment, but it has been so difficult for me to write lately.**

**I hope you enjoy this long awaited chapter.**

**000**

**Chapter Nine: To Steal From A Blind Man**

**000**

"Tell me something about myself, then." James said, sitting to the side of her, touching her bandaged wound with care, checking it.

"What was I like, you know, before?" He questioned, thoughtfully.

He watched with amusement as her face scrunched up as she was deep in thought, pondering the question. She had in fact offered to answer any.

"You were funny." She said, laughing. He wondered if she was recalling a memory of some sort.

"You had the poorest sense of humor; you always tried to tell me jokes that made no real connection but somehow always made me crack up."

He grinned. "Really?"

She caught his gaze and looked away. "Yeah."

He frowned. It was as if she couldn't bear the sight of him.

"Do I scare you?" He whispered.

She swallowed and pulled the jacket closer to her body. He watched her fidget nervously, suddenly aware of all the little human things she did that he was no longer capable of. They had already established that he wasn't human any longer.

"Yes." It stung.

He nodded, understanding. Did he really expect her to welcome him back like the good old days? Those supposed good days that he couldn't even recall.

He hated the cloud that was suffocating his memory.

"It's okay," He said, turning back towards her, smiling. "I'm sort of scared of you, too."

Her mouth dropped in the cutest way. "Me?"

He nodded. "You're something else."

Her mouth snapped shut and she shook her head. "What do you mean?"

His eyes bored into hers, focusing closely. He knew that the right words would come to him in a moment.

"Whenever I look at you," He began, her attention totally absorbed in him. "I feel as though, I'm missing something very important."

"It feels like that its right in my grasp, but I can't hold onto it. It's right under my nose, but I feel blind." He continued. "I know I need it, but I can't seem to get it. It's like my life is passing me by."

He sighed. "It terrifies me."

She was silent.

"So," He ran a hand through his hair. "That is why you scare me."

"Well, then," She spoke, blinking back what smelled like tears to him. "I apologize."

"It's not your fault, I-"

She placed her hand on top of his. "James, its fine."

He dropped the subject, reveling in the feel of warmth that her hand gave out. It was a sensation he feared he would never feel again.

He glanced back up to her face; her soft eyes that still held so much fear and yet seemed to be fighting against it at the same time. Did she want to truly be here, in this moment, with him?

Or was she forcing herself to sit next to a monster?

"I love you, James."

He closed his eyes and let the memory wash over him. The two people, the two bodies, mingling together. The passion. The emotion.

Was it him and Karen?

He could see himself, blue eyes staring up at him as though he were a ghost. The other figure, the woman, was hard to decipher. Her face was shadowed out, like a marker ran over the perfect picture. He marveled at the fact that he was seeing longer memories of when he was human.

When he was in love.

He allowed his eyes to flutter back open. "Do I," He paused, the unnatural feel of not having to take in a breath catching him off guard. His eyes took hold of Karen's and did not let go.

"Do I love you?"

000

She could have done it.

"Yes, James. You love me. We're madly in love."

She could have tricked him and he would've fallen for it.

He would have fallen hard.

"I-"

She could see the passion in his expression.

Do it.

"I don't know."

000

It was night once again.

James sat pondering about nothing in particular. He had decided not to ask Karen any more questions after that.

"I don't know."

It had really touched a nerve.

How could she not know if he loved her? Didn't she say that she loved him? A brusque growl rumbled through his chest. Doesn't anyone know anything at all?

And then a terrible thought rushed into his mind.

_Did I break her heart?_

It seemed like such a silly human thought. To take love from another, and give nothing back in return. To _**use**_ someone.

But why else would she not know?

He blinked, gazing up into the stars. Perhaps, Karen did love him.

And then he left her with mere thoughts of how their love could have been.

He shook his head.

He was truly a monster in every shape and form. Maybe, this bloodsucking cretin wasn't far from who he was when he was a regular human.

He was suddenly stabbed with a memory.

000

He was leaving.

"Why are you leaving me James? How could you?"

He was stroking Karen's cheek. He remembered how dreaded he felt. The feeling of sadness perked back into his memory. He hadn't wanted to leave, but it was for the right reasons at the time.

"Don't you know how much I love you?" She screamed, still crying. "You can't go!"

They were standing in a yard. Pretty flowers surrounded them. Was this her house? The background was blurry, only the flowers stood out; each petal perfectly drawn to his sight.

"I _have_ to go, Karen." His voice coated through the memory. He sounded different.

She cried harder.

"I swear that I will write to you every week. _Every week._ I promise that we'll keep in contact." He urged, now grasping her hands between his own.

"Why?" She blubbered. "Why can't you stay here, and go to college here?"

He paused.

"Don't you love me?" She whispered.

His human figure grimaced.

He could already tell that this was the moment where he went wrong. This is why Karen didn't know. He could feel it coming.

"I think...I think we need to take a break, Karen."

She was stunned into silence.

"We're _**too**_ good for each other." He chuckled. "And right now, I have to figure out what road I need to go down, and you need to finish high school without me bugging you every day. Remember how you used to make straight A's?" He cracked a grin.

So naive.

And those beautiful gray eyes. The tears were frozen inside them.

His human self frowned and touched her cheek once more. "I'm going to miss those grey eyes..."

000

He came back to reality shortly after.

_What an__** idiot**__ he had been_! Why, why were humans so naïve and stupid? He cursed himself constantly.

He could feel the pain in her eyes.

He sighed. The memory was so real. He felt drained to the bone.

And thirsty.

He clutched his head between his hands. Now that he registered his hunger, he could practically taste Karen's slowed heartbeat from inside the cabin.

Mere feet away.

000

The memory of sex came back suddenly.

It wasn't Karen that much was certain.

This woman was lanky and had bleached blond hair. James scolded himself for the choice immediately, but relished in the heat of the memory; it was indeed a pleasurable experience.

And then there was pain.

Extreme pain.

At first he didn't understand it; one moment the woman was crying out words of passion and love and the next, she was dead silent.

Her lips were pressed to his throat.

Biting.

Sucking his blood.

**000**

**A/N: Worth the wait? Sure hope so! Please review! :)**


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